Attachment Style & Finance
Understanding your money attachment style can enlighten your financial patterns and help you to create healthier ways to deal with money.
Your Money Attachment
Money attachment style refers to the way you emotionally and behaviorally relate to money.
Just like with people, our experiences and beliefs about money can lead to different attachment styles, influencing how we earn, spend, save, invest, and even think and talk about finances.
Secure Money Attachment
People with a secure money attachment feel comfortable with their financial situation, even if they wish for more or less debt. They trust their ability to manage money and believe they can handle financial ups and downs. They can balance saving and spending and generally have a positive and realistic outlook on their finances. They are usually comfortable discussing money matters.
Secure money attached individuals tend to be good at budgeting, planning, and making informed financial decisions. They can use money as a tool to achieve their goals and values without letting it control their emotions.
Anxious-Preoccupied Money Attachment
Individuals with this style often feel insecure and worried about their finances, constantly fearing they don’t have enough or might lose what they have. This anxiety can stem from a lack of trust in their ability to earn or manage money. This can manifest in several ways:
Compulsive Spending: Spending to soothe anxiety or seek temporary comfort.Workaholism: Overworking to feel financially secure.
Difficulty Letting Go: Anxiety around spending money, even on necessary things.
Fixation on Costs: Overly focusing on the price of things, potentially leading to stress and tension.
Dismissive-Avoidant Money Attachment
Dismissive Avoidant tend to avoid thinking, discussing, or dealing with money. They might feel uncomfortable with the emotions money stirs up and prefer to keep their distance. They often believe they don’t need much money to be happy or worthy and value independence in financial matters. This can manifest in several ways:
Ignoring Financial Matters: Not checking bank accounts, avoiding bills, or neglecting financial planning.
Discomfort Talking About Money: Shutting down or withdrawing when finances are discussed.
Overconfidence in Self-Reliance: Believing they can always “get by” on their own and dismissing the need for financial planning or help.
Fearful-Avoidant Money
Attachment
This style is characterized by a mix of both anxious and avoidant tendencies, leading to inconsistent and often contradictory behaviors towards money. Individuals may desire financial security but fear the vulnerability or potential negative emotions associated with it. This can look like:
Impulsive Spending Followed by Restriction: Alternating between overspending and extreme saving.
Difficulty Setting and Following Financial Goals: Due to internal conflict and instability.
Avoidance Coupled with Anxiety: Wanting to feel secure but fearing engagement with their finances.
Emotional Reactivity to Money: Experiencing significant mood swings related to their financial situation.
